CollegeHumor – Stars Against Santorum

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[CollegeHumor - Stars Against Santorum]

[Allie Haze "Pound the Round POV 5"] Source: LYBIO.net
By now you have probably heard of presidential hopeful Rick Santorum’s anti p**nography policy.

[Chastity Lynn Bj's in Pj's]
If elected, Santorum has vowed to prosecute our industry on infrequently enforced obscenity laws.

[Allie Haze "Pound the Round POV 5"]
But as p**n stars and Americans, we can’t let that happen.

[Chastity Lynn Bj's in Pj's]
[shakes her head no]

[Allie Haze "Pound the Round POV 5"]
Picture a world without p**nography.

[Chanel Preston 'Beggin' for a Peggin']
Pizza delivery boys with nothing to dream about.

[Jerry 'Desperate Housewhores 4']
People masturbating to Facebook photos

[Allie Haze "Pound the Round POV 5"]
Or worst of all people using just their imaginations

[Chanel Preston 'Beggin' for a Peggin']
Santorum says watching p**n causes profound brain changes resulting in negative consequences. Besides not being supported by any facts, wouldn’t the opposite be true. p**n lets you visualize your fantasies so that you don’t have to walk around like a tightly wound sexually repressed time bomb.

[Allie Haze "Pound the Round POV 5"]
Great idea starting a war with the internet. How did that work out for you last time?

[Chanel Preston 'Beggin' for a Peggin']
Besides, what are you going to do? Erase all of the p**n

[Allie Haze "Pound the Round POV 5"]
As soon as you took one down, two more would pop up, like a mythical multiple headed p**no beast. Actually, that’s a good idea for p**no.

[Chanel Preston 'Beggin' for a Peggin']
So to protest Santorum, on May 1st at 8pm, we’re staging the worlds largest wankout. Just open up your favourite p**n.

[Allie Haze "Pound the Round POV 5"] Source: LYBIO.net
The one you downloaded to your harddrive and named

[Chanel Preston 'Beggin' for a Peggin']
Old college papers

[Jerry 'Desperate Housewhores 4']
2010 taxes

[Allie Haze "Pound the Round POV 5"]
Grandma’s 80th birthday party

[Chastity Lynn Bj's in Pj's]
and let loose. Together we can franchise ourselves through the power of incessant masturbation.

[Chanel Preston 'Beggin' for a Peggin']
Maybe it’s me in the biker bar and getting tied up and [beep] like the bad girl that I am.

[Chastity Lynn Bj's in Pj's]
Or us, me on top [bleep bleep] on her pool table.

[Jerry 'Desperate Housewhores 4']
You good?

[Chastity Lynn Bj's in Pj's]
So vote Romney

[Allie Haze "Pound the Round POV 5"]
Wait, Romney is a Republican dick hole too.

[Chastity Lynn Bj's in Pj's]
So Santorum, because if he wins primary, he would definitely get crushed by Obama.

[Allie Haze "Pound the Round POV 5"]
And Obama would never try to stop the p**n industry

[Chastity Lynn Bj's in Pj's] Source: LYBIO.net
So Santorum, it’s the long game.

CollegeHumor – Stars Against Santorum. Santorum says watching p**n causes profound brain changes resulting in negative consequences. Complete Full Transcript, Dialogue, Remarks, Saying, Quotes, Words And Text.