Louis CK – Pot
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[Louis CK – Pot]
[WARNING EXPLICIT LANGUAGE]
[Louis Szekely (September 12, 1967)] Source: LYBIO.net
I can’t smoke pot, cause it’s the same thing, I’m too old for it. Sometimes young people come up to me after shows: “Hey do you wanna smoke some pot?” And I’m like: “Can I get my portion to smoke without you later because – I don’t wanna stand in a parking lot with 20 year olds.” [laughing]. Last time I got high I was in Kansas City and I got high cause I was in Kansas City – shitty. After the show, these kids that worked at the club – you wanna smoke some pot – Ah yes! So I’m standing in a parking lot with these kids like 20 years old and we’re smoking a joint and I’m taking huge hits cause I had no idea, I didn’t know that they have been working on this shit, like it’s the cure for cancer. I didn’t understand the fuckin technology that’s got into making pot is so powerful – cause when I was a kid you could smoke a joint for a while, now you take two hits and you go insane – its not doable anymore. And I – and I was taking like big hits, like 1970’s jean jacket Bad Company hits. Phhhhhh – here come the CHESTERS, one two three. Phhhhsss, it’s all part of my fantasy. And I’m like: “Yeah!” And even the kid with the wooden hole of no ear; the absence of flesh in his ear with wood, I don’t know what that is. Even he was like: “That – you should be careful, that’s a lot of pot, that’s very strong Marijuana.” Ah- yeah I’m fine. Phhhhhhh – running with the devil – just fuckin – and about 10 seconds everything just bbbbbllllluuuuurrrr – bbbbbbbbbuuuuuuuuuuu – and I’m like: “Oh shit.” This is an ordeal now. I’m not gonna feel okay for a very long time. And everybody is just standing around and talking and I’m hoping like, I’m really hoping that I look like this. [upright and casual & normal] But I’m pretty sure that I was just scanning insanely.
I just like counting like; look at her for five, four, three, two, one, switch to him, five, four, three, two, randomize, don’t go in the same direction. Five, four, three, nod your head, that looks like your listening if you nod your head. HA HA HA! At one point I realized I need to get out of here because the air is hitting my arm weirdly and they can tell. They can totally know that I’m not handling the way air is touching my arm right now. Why am I doing that with my hand, that’s weird when you do that with your hand. Nobody stands like this. Nobody stands like this, just fuckin – no that’s also. That’s weird too, that’s crazy. Just shhh-it. I gotta go.
But I didn’t know how to leave because I had this dilemma, we are all standing in a perfect circle facing each other. And I thought it’s gonna be insane if I just turn my – I’m one person with my back now – Do I just back away like this – hope that they fill in. And then I thought – say something – say something out loud to them that soothes the transition of you leaving. Okay, what do I say? Pick a thing to say; “Goodbye.” That’s a – that’s a nightmare. That’s a – “Goodbye.” That’s not even – that’ just noises. Finally, I walked away and said: “I’M LEAVING!” And I – I know it was that bad. because they all went shit ohhhh – ok, great, whoa. I’ll never see those people as long as I live. And then I had to get in the car and I forgot that I had rented a car and I have to dive back to the hotel. And I’m driving on this highway in Missouri and at one point I realize I think it has been about 25 minutes since I’ve looked out of the front window of this car. [laughing] I just have been dealing with shit directly in – [gestures car operations] oh shit! There is a whole spectrum of responsibility out here I’m suppose to – take part in this.
[Louis CK] Source: LYBIO.net
And at one point I remember I was in a drive thru and I was terrified because there’s a lady sticking her head out of a window and she’s mad, she’s going: “Sir! Sir!” I just kept saying: “I don’t know. I don’t know. I DON’T KNOW!” I had the window closed, I had no fuckin idea. What part of the transaction am I — Did I pay yet? Have I ordered? Did I – have I been sitting here for 40 minutes just eating at the window and I ate the paper and everything? “Sir?” And I just went: “I know – I don’t want it!” And I just fuckin bolted. So I can’t do that anymore.
Louis CK – Pot. So I’m standing in a parking lot with these kids like 20 years old and we’re smoking a joint and I’m taking huge hits cause I had no idea, I didn’t know that they have been working on this shit, like it’s the cure for cancer. Complete Full Transcript, Dialogue, Remarks, Saying, Quotes, Words And Text.