Lad Describes Every Boys Night Out In Under 2 Minutes
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[Lad Describes Every Boys Night Out In Under 2 Minutes]
[Lad:] Source: LYBIO.net
Show up at a local nightclub:
You walk into the nightclub after being in the boozer; you’ve sunk about five pints of the booze and now you’re ready to boogie a little bit.
You get past the bouncers and you walk straight in, but there’s always that one mate that stands aside talking to the bouncers telling him about how his brother’s a bouncer, his dad’s a bouncer and he’s hard as fuck.
You walk across the dance floor to the bar after you’ve just passed all the single mums, the sixteen year old girls and the fifty year old divorced geezer who’s going to look for a good time. You’ve just got yourself a drink: cushty. You lean across the bar, scouting out the talent like you’re fucking James Bond. You make eye contact with a little sort that you like, she’s giving you the eye to come out, so you boogie on to her. You mum’s ironed your Ralph Lauren polo so you’re looking sharp as fuck and your hair’s on point. You ain’t getting pie tonight bruh.
You go straight in:
“Sorry, I’ve got a boyfriend.”
Back to the drawing board. You check out the VIP area, the booths are occupied by six or seven apprentice bricklayers that have all put two for one bottle of Grey Goose and think they’re ballers. So you have a little giggle at them.
You walk back to the dance floor and there are geezers in suits and sunglasses leaning against the wall nodding about like they’re drug dealers or something; you gotta watch out for those geezers.
You walk into the toilets and there’s an African geezer there selling spray and lollipops. You’re pissed out your face, so you end up talking to him for fifteen minutes, and you end up paying him five nicker for a spray of fucking Channel.
So you walk out the toilets and you’ve lost all your fucking mates. So you lean against the wall in the club slightly swaying cos you’re a bit pissed on the group chat asking the lads where they are. Lo and behold, they message you back saying they’re in the smoking area having a burn. When you’re in the smoking area you’ll always get that ugly bird that comes up to you asking for a lighter, when all she’s hoping for is that you’ve got a good job, and you can take her home smash her and wife her up. Behave with them type of girls, it can start with a lighter in the club and it can end up with three fucking kids.
[Lad:] Source: LYBIO.net
Now you’re really pissed. You walk up by the DJ booth and start talking to the DJ like you know him and you’re best mates. You shake his hand hoping a girl will see you and think “he’s mates with the DJ let’s jump on his corey.”
It’s nearly kicking out time and you’ve come to the realization that you’re getting no fanny, so you think you may as well get absolutely destroyed. That’s when the naughty tequila comes out. Come kicking out time you’re walking out like fucking Pingu.
That’s it, night’s over, taxi, home, bed.
[Lad:] Source: L Y B I O . N E T
Then you wake up the next morning, realize you’ve wasted about fifty sovs, fucking regretting it all, then you get a text off one of your nutcase mates asking if you wanna go for a few beers in the boozer. Fuck’s sake.
Lad Describes Every Boys Night Out In Under 2 Minutes. That’s it, night’s over, taxi, home, bed. Complete Full Transcript, Dialogue, Remarks, Saying, Quotes, Words And Text.