Keri Traver – My Story
The Accurate Source To Find Transcript To Keri Traver – My Story.”
[Keri Traver – My Story]
[Keri Traver] Source: LYBIO.net
Hello, my name is Keri. I am a mother of four kids and the fifth is on his way.This morning, when I woke up I realized that I was finally ready to express my story and my personal experience about what I went through. It was so tough! I hope that none of you guys will ever go through what I experienced. I hope not.
The situation caused us so much pain, heartbreaking, humiliating, and fear. Yes, I was so afraid. My children, my family, and I were traumatized. Wow. I had nightmares for a long time after this experience and recently, only recently it finally stopped. I know l must share my story from the bottom of my heart in hopes of self-healing of pain, fear, and anger. I’m ready. I hope all of you guys listen and understand where I come from. I have changed. This will help you understand why my views on the world and views on people have changed. I am a different person now than I was. This story started last year, October 2011. My oldest child of four who is 7 years old– (his name is Conner.) He was in my bedroom, watching a movie, and the room is right next to the kitchen. I was in the kitchen cooking Macaroni & Cheese for lunch. My husband was outside setting up a horse shelter before the upcoming winter, and before he had to go to work in North Dakota (which is 8 hours away) on an oil rig.
He was due to leave for his job tomorrow (which is a Sunday). So, I was cooking lunch and I felt a strong thump! Quickly, I ran in my bedroom to see what was going on. My son met me halfway clutching to his shoulder in pain and wailing. I asked him what happened? I tried to understand what he was trying to say but it was unreadable, due to his wounds, it made his signing a bit difficult to read his full story. I called my husband to come in to take a look and see what was wrong. We decided to wait for my father in law to arrive. (He was already on his way anyway to help set up the horse shelter.) We wanted his opinion on Conner’s shoulder injury. We put him into our bed and comforted him. After a while, Conner fell asleep. About half-an-hour later, my father in law finally arrived. We guided him into our bedroom to check on Conner. He softly tapped his shoulder but he didn’t wake up and cry. He said it was definitely not broken and told us that he would be fine for now. My father in law said, If it was indeed broken and he taps that shoulder he would have woken up in pain. So, it is okay and not broken. So, I woke up Conner up and told him that his grandfather was here. He told his grandfather what happened that he fell on it and it was still hurt. He determined that he was alright and advised to give him medicine. The reason we needed my father in law’s opinion whether we should bring my son to hospital or not, because it was Saturday, and we don’t have a medical insurance. But, my father in law said nah, Conner is doing fine because he is moving his shoulder and signing. That meant his shoulder was not broken or serious injured but probably bruised. He said to just continue monitoring him to make sure he is okay, so we continued to keep an eye on him. The next day, (Sunday) my husband packed and left for his job in North Dakota. He had to work on Monday morning and since it is a 8 hour drive, he had to leave. All day Sunday, it was a normal day. I monitored Conner and all he wanted to do was run around, jumping on the trampoline doing flips, and signing to me (to communicate). So, he seemed he was doing okay but I reminded him that he should take it easy. The next morning, (Monday) I decided I let him go to his school because he seemed to be fine. I gave him some medicine just to be sure, and I texted his teacher and told her about his minor injury that occurred during the weekend. I asked that she make sure that Conner takes it easy if he goes to P.E. and recess. I told Conner the same thing that morning before school.
[Keri Traver] Source: LYBIO.net
Later, at about 10AM, I received a text message from Conner’s teacher telling me that my son’s shoulder was a serious injury and something was broken. She said he needed to be seen by the doctor. I was puzzled and confused, reflecting on the previous day’s and that morning activities, it seemed impossible. I was like, “Okay, sure…” I called our family doctor’s office about his shoulder and requested to schedule an appointment. I told the doctor that the school wanted me to bring him in. The doctor’s office acknowledged it and told me that they will call me back when they contact an interpreter and schedule an appointment. Because this area I live in is a small rural community which means there is less availability of ASL interpreters.
They needed to call and see who is available to come and interpret. So, I waited for a half hour later until I got a call from my doctor and they said they got an interpreter and my appointment was early that afternoon. I texted Conner’s teacher and informed her that I got an doctor’s appointment with an interpreter and that I would be on my way to pick Conner up, but I needed to get gas because the doctor’s office is 45 miles away from my home. So, I got ready to go. My two oldest kids were already at school, so I had my two of youngest girls dressed up and ready to go.
We all got into the SUV, and drove to the gas station and got some gas. After I filled up, I texted Conner’s teacher again letting her know that we were
leaving the gas station and should be there shortly, and to have Conner ready to be picked up to go to the doctor’s. I received no response back. I drove into town to the school, I noticed there were sever police cars parked by the building. I thought that was strange, but thought nothing of it. Right after I parked, an officer came over to me and stopped me from getting out of my vehicle. I was confused, he got out a piece of paper and started writing. (Because I live in a small town, everybody knows me and that I am deaf.) What he wrote was: “Your son is on his way to the hospital in an ambulance.
The school called 911. They just left a few minutes ago.” I was SHOCKED. My eyes widened– Why would they send him into an ambulance without letting me know?! I was JUST texting with the teacher and they knew I was on my way over to the school to get him! I was shocked and confused. Because the teacher did not text me back to let me know what was going on in the school, I immediately felt that something was funny and fishy. The officer told me to go ahead and go to the hospital and that the school would watch my oldest daughter. (She goes to morning kindergarten.) I was like, okay whatever. I left on my way to the hospital (which was 45 minutes away also.) My mind was racing. I had no one here as a support system. The deaf community here is almost non-existent.
I didn’t have any family around except my husband’s parents. I get along OK with my father in law, but I didn’t really get along with my mother in law. With my mind racing, I knew I had no choice; but to ask for HELP. But who do I ask?! The only person available that was around: my mother in law. I texted her and asked her to immediately meet me at the hospital.
I NEED HELP.
When I arrived to the hospital, I raced through the ER with my two young daughters. I came into my son’s room– Conner was on the bed. Conner was excited to see me arrive, and greeted me with a tight hug….. with BOTH arms around my neck. I started to talk to him and my head turned towards the wall. There were two people there: Conner’s teacher and an unknown woman. The woman stood up and waved her hand. She handed me a business card, I looked down and my world STOPPED. Everything around me froze. The business card read: Children Protective Services. My mind was in shock. “What?” I thought. Something was going on…. this was not right. She started to write something down. I told her, “No. I need an interpreter.”
Inside my gut, I knew I had to have an interpreter present, period. (When I arrived into the ER I let them know I needed an interpreter and they were going to get one.) BUT– here’s the thing. WHERE is the interpreter right now? Right.. at the doctor’s office waiting! What a waste of time! That meant, it would take a long time for an interpreter to show up.
(Remember, I live in a very small community.)
In the meanwhile while waiting for an interpreter, I focused on my son- talking, playing, etc.. and ignored the two women in the room. Conner seemed FINE.
My mother in law finally arrived, when she walked into the room she started to greet the CPS woman. I immediately locked eyes with her and told her to not talk to that woman. She caught on the vibe and asked what was going on. I told her everything that had happened that morning. She said that was WRONG! We both ignored the CPS woman and continued to chat and interact with my children. (My mother in law is an interpreter at the local high school.)
The CPS woman stood up and asked my mother in law to interpret for her because obviously, she can sign.
I told her “NO!, that woman is my mother in law. It is AGAINST the code of ethics, and against the law to interpret for me.” The CPS woman wouldn’t budge– saying that she had to talk to me NOW. I wanted to know what was really going on, so I obligated since the interpreter was on her way shortly anyway. I reminded her that it was not professional and against the law to have my mother in law interpret.
The CPS woman did not believe me, but we went ahead and sat down. My kids were also in the room as we were sitting down. She told me– “I cannot let you take your kids home, I have to take them with me.” … … … At that moment, I stared at her, as my mother in law did too. I was…. like, WHAT?! The first thing I asked was “WHY? W-H-Y?!?!?!” She replied with: “I feel that Conner was abused. That is why he got injured.” I looked at her… “Abused, what?! ME?!”
She assured me that it was not me; she suspected that it was my husband who did it. I told her, “My husband is not even at home. He was way over there 8 hours away in North Dakota.” The CPS lady did not even believe me- giving me faces. I told her that she can verify with his employers, or whoever to validate my statement. If she was worried about him and not me- that is fine. I am the only one currently at home. My husband was gone anyway, she can continue her investigate and find that there is nothing.
[Keri Traver] Source: LYBIO.net
She said that she was still concerned about the kids’ safety. I looked over to where my three children who were running around happily and laughing. Every now and then they would come up to me and give me hugs, show me books, etc. I asked her if that was a sign of kids who were being abused?! Oh please! If the kids were scared into a corner, then YES there is a severe concern.
But— my kids were so happy and jumping around, EVEN Conner who has an “injured shoulder”… I then told her, “OK, this discussion is OVER. We need to wait for the interpreter to arrive before proceeding any further.” She gave me some more faces. After a while, the doctor came into the room with an interpreter.
The doctor said that the X-rays cleared and showed no broken bones. (D-U-H!) And that he was cleared to go, he could even go back into school the same day; he just needed to take it easy. (D-U-H again!) The doctor filled out his report and then cleared us, BUT the CPS lady would not let us leave. She said that she wanted an formal meeting with me.
So, the nurses watched my 3 kids (minus one who was still at school) We got a private room and sat down. I wanted to know what was going on and why I could not take my kids and leave since the doctor cleared us to go. The CPS lady said that she felt uneasy letting the children come home with me. At that point, I finally broke.
WHY.. W H Y?! Why?! My kids DO NOT LOOK ABUSED! Nothing! My world shattered into pieces. To have someone threaten to take your kids is not a funny situation. It is scary, period. I told her, “No. I am taking my kids home with me, end of discussion.” My kids had already heard what happened in the other room and they knew something was going on.
They are not stupid kids. They were starting to get scared, thinking some stranger would be taking them away. I shook my head again. “I am taking my kids home. I guarantee that my kids are SAFE.” She hesitated, but then came up with a proposal. I would be able to take my children home, BUT I had to agree to allow NO contact with their father, in any way. NONE. He was also banned from coming into our home. If he had any contact or came home, he would be thrown in jail and my children taken from me. I agreed, as long as my kids would be coming home with me. (That was the most important thing to me at that point.)
They can do their investigation, whatever until they find that there is actually no concern about being abused. I had to sign their statement and my agreement. I hesitated when I signed, because I knew it felt wrong. But– I had no choice, or they would not let my children go home with me. So, I took the kids home with me. When we arrived home, the kids began being clingy. They would not let me go, and refused to sleep in their own bedrooms. They had to sleep in my room. I was feeling like a lioness and welcomed them into my room, of course. I was scared just like them. The next day, I sent my two oldest kids to school and told Conner the same thing I had told him the day before– take it easy on his shoulder and gave him some medicine. His shoulder was improving and was not so sore anymore. They came home from school that afternoon, Conner said his day was great other than the normal soreness.
About 30 minutes later, I noticed a CPS woman…. WITH a sheriff peeking into all the windows on my back deck. They did NOT knock on my front door first. That was a total invasion of privacy! I went to open the sliding door and asked what was going on?! The sheriff asked. “Is DUSTIN there?!” I looked at the CPS woman and said, “No, I already told you that Dustin is in North Dakota working for two weeks.” The CPS woman said, “No, no.. the kids at school told me today that their Dad was at home.” I was appalled. That means the CPS people came to my kids school without me knowing and interrogate my children IN SCHOOL away from their EDUCATION?!
I asked if they brought an interpreter with them to my house? They said… “No, they do not need an interpreter to talk to meand that I had to let them into my home.” I refused to let them in my home, I repeated that they needed to have an interpreter present, period. In addition to that– they had no warrant.
They continued to bully me, telling me that they did not need an interpreter. I reminded them of the American Disabilities Act (ADA) law that requires interpreters to be present. I then closed the door and went to call the Rocky Mountain ADA Center located in Colorado using SIPRelay.
I explained my situation. They confirmed that I am indeed entitled to an interpreter in this situation. I took my laptop with me to the sliding door and showed them the conversation. They continued to not believe me, and called the county judge and the county judge told them that they were right, I do not need an interpreter (OMG!)
It was a battle between us– me saying yes; them saying no. Finally, the sheriff gave up after interrogating my kids if their daddy was in the house. My kids confirmed that he was not so the sheriff left. The CPS woman remained. I remained firm– I needed an interpreter. The woman rolled her eyes. I told her that I am willing to talk for a few minutes, but the next time she comes she MUST have an interpreter.
So, we wrote back and forth outside in the cold. I didn’t care if she was cold, it was her fault. She expressed her continued concern for my kids, that I was alone at home with 4 kids. I told her… there are MANY single mothers out there who take care of their kids just fine. I will be fine. I am used to being alone at home with my children, since my husband always had to work out of town/state. I would be fine. My children are happy, I am happy– but at that moment of course I was not very happy, obviously. We argued for a while. I kept track of what was said and the discrimination against deaf and the times it was said. She would not let me keep the notepad that we wrote back and forth on so I had to keep track on a separate piece of paper.
Before she left, I reminded her that she HAD to being in a professional ASL interpreter. The next day, she came back- with an interpreter so I let her into my home. I put my kids in my bedroom and set up a movie for them to watch. I could not have them hear any more of this- they were already terrorized by all this! CPS was continuing to interrogate them at school, and all that.
Anyway– I had my mom on a cell phone on the table so she could hear everything that was going on. My mother could not physically be there because of her health. She wanted to be there in some form to support me. During that meeting I said, “Dustin will NEVER hit anyone. You can ask anybody- his parents, etc.”
It was a lengthy discussion. My mother– I am so thankful for her. She is VERY supportive of me. She stood right by my side and she gave the CPS many points. The CPS expressed her concerns about me being deaf with children. If the kids got hurt, I would not be able to hear them. I told her, sometimes, I have to go to the bathroom. I am not going to take my 7 year old son in the bathroom with me. That was highly inappropriate. She said… OK. Who will watch your son then? While you’re in the bathroom?
[Keri Traver] Source: LYBIO.net
MANY families out there …..do not take their children with them to the bathroom! ….. They kept trying to find reasons that my deafness is a barrier to me being a mother and raising my children.
My mother, on the phone, said that as a child, I was very active, I fell sometimes, and etc. My kids are also active– it shows that they are healthy
normal active kids. Being monkeys, and all that– pretty normal, right? She said: “…. Normal kids do not get hurt.” I was appalled. I thought there was something wrong with her head. I asked: “When my kids fall, am I required to report it?”
“Yes. Each fall, each scratch, and each bruise.” was her response. My eyes widened. “WOW?! Do you actually have the manpower and the time for EACH family to call your office to report every single little thing?!” She stuttered after that. I had made my point. She would not let go of her concern that I was a deaf mother raising four children.
She said that it would be best if she took the children with her until I could get someone to help me at home. ….. I was like, OH MY GOD! ….. “NO, you are NOT taking my kids. You ALREADY traumatized them! Already! They are scarred for LIFE. They are constantly thinking someone will take them away
or throw their Daddy in jail– because they heard you say it.” I also asked, where do you think my kids are right now? Over there in my bedroom- alone. You seem fine with it right now. Again, she stuttered. I made another point. After some more back and forth argument, she told me that the State of Montana has ordered me to have someone from the state come and stay with me to supervise me supervising my kids ll day in my home. I told her that would be fine if I was ordered to– BUT… they would HAVE to ALSO hire an interpreter so I could communicate with that state worker in my home.
I asked if she had any idea how much an interpreter costs x 8 hours a day? It is very, very costly.” I told her that I understood that the CPS is out there for a good reason, some families and children NEEDS that help. But to pick on an innocent family and spend that much money on an innocent family is unnecessary. Use your time and resources on someone who NEEDS the help! After some more argument, it was finally decided that I was to find someone on my own to come and stay with me for two weeks… or they will take the kids away. … At that point… who do I reach to?
The deaf community here is almost non-existent. My in laws work, and we do not get along. My mother WANTS to help, but her health was a barrier, and she lives 500 miles away. I was in anguish. The next few days, I was heartbroken. I had NO HELP. NO ONE.
[Keri Traver] Source: LYBIO.net
My husband was supportive through texting, but remember, he could not come home. I was stuck. It was very tough. There is more to the story. NO ONE should ever experience what I went through. NO ONE. CPS is not a laughing matter. I had NO help. No one. Everyone that I reached to said they were afraid to help, afraid that CPS will go after their kids too (which is totally not true!), or they did not understand what I was going through, etc..
I stood ground, alone. Now, today… January 2013, my kids STILL do not sleep in their rooms. They STILL won’t. They still sleep in my bedroom on the floor on a makeshift bed. Still! They are scarred for LIFE. FOR LIFE!!! ….. Finally, the CPS issue has disappeared for now. My case has been closed when they realized that there was nothing. Wow, it was the longest three months of my life. With them bothering us, interrogating us, checking on us, and my children in school. I had to ask strangers for help, and some church people for help. Wow. I was NOT safe. Going through this experience, I hope that NONE of you will ever have to go through this. None. This experience has changed the way I perceive the world, has changed the way I perceive people. It has changed the way I view things. I used to be such a naive, friendly girl. Now I am still friendly, but aware. When I see something I do not like, I am quick to state it. I am just more aware of what people are capable of. WOW. It hurt when I had no help. So, my message to you– if you are going through a similar experience… OPEN UP right away! Contact through networks to the Deaf community.. I know that if someone is in the same shoes as I was in,I would step in to HELP. Even if they are strangers. I KNOW what it is like. I wish I had opened up and asked ANYBODY for help, not just limited to my inner circle of family and friends. I really wish I didn’t. Sometimes people can be unreliable. Again, if something like this happens to you– remember my advice, GO TO THE COMMUNITY! The Deaf community is there for you! We WILL help! Love you all. Thank you for listening.
Keri Traver – My Story. WITH a sheriff peeking into all the windows on my back deck. They did NOT knock on my front door first. That was a total invasion of privacy! Complete Full Transcript, Dialogue, Remarks, Saying, Quotes, Words And Text.