John Oliver DESTROYS TRUMP For Inventing Sweden Terrorist Attack

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John Oliver DESTROYS TRUMP For Inventing Sweden Terrorist Attack

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[John Oliver DESTROYS TRUMP For Inventing Sweden Terrorist Attack]

[John Oliver:] Source: LYBIO.net
In this evening with President Trump: two words that will always sound unnatural together, like ‘fuckable clown’ or’Wolf Blitzer’. And the reason we have to start with him is Trump dominates the news cycle the way a fart dominates the interior of a Volkswagen Beetle. There is simply no escape from him.

Now just a case in point, last night, Trump held a pointless rally in Florida which got roadblock coverage across cable news. And while his speech was mostly boilerplate Trump, the media is fake, Chicago is a nightmare, I’m the greatest. There was one thing he said while warning about the danger of refugees that caught people’s attention.

[Donald Trump:]
You look at what’s happening last night in Sweden. Sweden, who would believe this. Sweden. They took in large numbers. They’re having problems like they never thought possible.

[John Oliver:] Source: LYBIO.net
Oh no! What happened there? Did someone blow up Sweden’s most famous landmark, and if they did, what was it? There was just one little problem with what the President said. And I think this news clip sums it up.

[Anchor Fredricka Whitfield:]
We start this hour with an urgent plea from Sweden to the U.S. government, asking, what is your President talking about?

[John Oliver:]
Yeah, it turns out there was no terror attack. And look, just a quick message to all other countries on earth: in the future, you are going to find yourselves wanting to ask what is your President talking about a great deal, and the answer is almost always going to be, we have no fucking idea.

Now, Trump has since admitted his comment was in reference to a story that was broadcast on Fox News the night before concerning immigrants and Sweden, so sifting through Trump’s brain to see why he said something is now like examining a shark’s stomach to see what it ate. Oh, okay, there’s a sea urchin, a decomposed dolphin skull, oh a Fox News segment on Sweden. That’s what did it, it’s stuck in his throat.

Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) · Twitter
My statement as to what’s happening in Sweden was in reference to a story that was broadcast on @FoxNews concerning immigrants & Sweden.

[John Oliver:] Source: LYBIO.net
So here’s where we’re at right now: Trump can dominate the news merely by referencing something that didn’t happen in Sweden, and that is a real shame, because this week has seen a great deal of fascinating stories go under-covered, like this one.

AIRPORT ASSASSINATION

[Reporter:]
The estranged half-brother of North Korean leader Kim Jong Un was poisoned as he waited for a flight.

[John Oliver:] Source: LYBIO.net
That story is both incredible and not entirely surprising because if you’re associated with Kim Jong Un, your odds are being murdered are around the same as if you live in a town that Jessica Fletcher on Murder, She Wrote.

Death follows that woman wherever she goes and I’ll tell you why because and this is true, she’s a serial killer #Jessica Fletcher Is a Serial Killer. But it wasn’t so much who was killed that was surprising with the story it was how.

[Reporter:]
One of the two women accused of carrying out the hit, now says she thought she was just taking part in a TV prank show. Police say the suspect claims she was paid to convince men to close their eyes and she would spray them with water along with another woman as part of a gag. But with the last target Kim Jong Nam, police believe the water was secretly replaced with deadly poison.

[John Oliver:]
Holy shit that is a really harsh prank show. Ha-ha-ha, you’re dead and you are a murderer. I got you. Well, actually she got you and we got her, but still we are double pranked.

There is nothing that is not fascinating about that story, but it didn’t get the attention it deserved and the same is true of this incredible story that you probably missed from Florida.

[Reporter:]
A Florida man behind bars this morning accused of plotting to blow up Target stores up and down the East Coast. According to the arresting documents the 48-year old offered someone $10,000 to put 10 bombs on the shelves inside Target stores; warning not to let the boxes bounce around or they would explode. His motive authorities say Barnett hope the bombings would send Target stock prices plummeting so he could buy shares on the cheap.

[John Oliver:] Source: L Y B I O . N E T
Magnificent. That story contains homemade explosives, a big box store and idiotic get-rich-quick scheme and felony charges if it’s somehow also involved a snake on meth. You’d have full on Florida Bingo right there. And the stories don’t stop there, you also miss the fact that British Prime Minister, Theresa May went to see some children’s Lego robot creations and this is the face that she made and if you think you will hold on that’s unfair the camera just caught a split second there. She also made this face and then this face. What is that goshly monstrosity street rat, did you created using your imagination.

I thought we got rid of those after we Brexited scurry along rats, scurry along.

John Oliver DESTROYS TRUMP For Inventing Sweden Terrorist Attack

John Oliver DESTROYS TRUMP For Inventing Sweden Terrorist Attack

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