Fred’s – Mom Is Missing
Hey it’s Fred and I’m kinda worried right now – because you know how my mom was at the bar last week when I was with Bertha, well she hasn’t came back yet. I mean I left with Bertha but my mom hasn’t came back. My mom told me that if she’s gone for 3 days then it’s okay, but if she’s gone for more than five days then I have to notify the police. And it’s been like a week. Wait a second, if I don’t have a mom then that means I can do anything I want! I’m gonna caught off my moms favorite panty-hoes. ( background music plays hip hop from http://KevBlaze.com : Watch How I Do This By Kev Blaze ).
My mom always used to get mad at me when I did this. ( Fred jumps up and down and swings his arms side to side ). Bye Bye medication. ( toilet flushes ) Ha Ha Ha Ha. OMG, what if the toilet gets clogged now! Then when I go potty it wont flush. I’m gonna jump all over my moms bed. ( screams ) I’ll never have to get locked up in this cage every again! My mom used to lock me in there whenever I did bad stuff. Sometimes she kept hitting me for over 3 days. I’m gonna take a shower with clothes on. Wait that is so stupid!
Then I would get my friends all wet that would be totally stupid. I’m gonna put on my moms deodorant. Ewh it smells like a man! I’m gonna shave my face just like my mom does every morning. Here I go. (Scream) Ah I cut my face! (Scream) Oh my gosh it’s almost dinner time I wonder what my mom is making inside the kitchen? Oh my God! ( oh dare it ) My mom is not even here to make me supper or breakfast or lunch. And usually she makes me a TV dinner but still. I don’t know how to work the microwave. OMG, who is gonna tuck me in for bed? Read me bed time stories, listen to me when I have problems? And all that stuff? Wait! My mom never didn’t do any of that stuff when she was here. But who cares, I still want my mom back. I mean my dad is already in the State Pen. So I don’t want my mom to be gone too. But I’m not gonna tell the police that my mom’s missing.
Cause if I tell the police that she’s missing, they are gonna put me in a foster home. So I’m just gonna make flyer’s and post them around town. And hopefully somebody will find her. Okay, this is what the flyer is gonna look like. “My mom is missing, Help!”. And I even drew a picture of her so they can find her better. Okay, I’m really scared right now. Because if my mom doesn’t come back soon – what if that guy from Youtube comes over and I’m here all alone? It’s like a child predators dream to have a kid home alone. Okay, I have to post these flyer’s around town. So I’m gonna have to go. But if your watching this and think you’ve seen my mom, please, tell me. If you wanna know what she looks like, she’s fat, she has a big nose, her hair is shoulder length and its kinda scraggly, she really doesn’t take care of herself. A common place you can find my mom is obviously the bar. You can also find my mom standing on corners, wearing revealing outfits. She’s never really told me why she does that but she’s told me that it somehow makes her money. Who knows? Okay, well I really have to go hung up these flyer’s so I really have to go. Bye.
People take there moms for granted.
( pause )
I want my mom!