College Humor – Anti-Drug Dog
Dog says: Hey Aubrey! I wish you wouldn’t smoke weed – You are not the same when you smoke – um – I miss my friend – I will be outside.
( Aubrey walks into the house and puts the keys on the counter )
Dog says: Where have you been?
Dog says: It’s four o’clock in the fzzkin morning.
Aubrey: I was out with my friends.
Dog says: Are you ‘high’?
Dog says: Look at me with your blood shot eyes and say that!
Aubrey: You can’t tell me what to do – Okay – you shit on the carpet this morning.
Dog says: I’m a Dog, Aubrey, you are a human fzzkin being.
Cat says: Hey guys, have you seen my – whoa – I will come back latter.
Aubrey: I’m going to my room.
Dog: Fine, go to your room – smoke a ‘dubie’ and listen to ‘My chemical romance’ – it’s so hard growing tits.
( door slams )
Dog: Ah… this is why I drink – this is why I drink.